Formative Discipline: How We Help Each Other Follow Jesus
I’m not sure the kind of context many of you reading this grew up in, but I was raised as the son of a pastor. And when you’re the son of a pas tor, all eyes are watching. Not to despise or demean, but to care and look out for. I recall when growing up it was fairly common for my parents to come to me with a report they had heard from another parent in the church. This sense of community was helpful growing up, though not always effective at tempering my misdeeds! While it may not have felt like it then, I’m thankful for those in our church who, because of their love for us, considered it their business to help my parents raise me and my siblings to honor the Lord.
Whether you grew up as a pastor’s kid in church, or not, you might have had a similar experience in the neighborhood or environment you grew up in. A community that saw it as their collective responsibility to watch over each other. That kind of community, while helpful in the world, is truly necessary in the church. Christians covenanted together in the local church are to be involved in watching over one another’s souls as the Lord works in them to sanctify each member. As church members, we are called to love one another in a unique way that is expressed in committed love for one another. This includes church discipline.
More Than Meets the Eye
Maybe when you think of church discipline your mind jumps first to excommunication which is the final step in what we call corrective or restorative discipline (see the next article for more). Corrective discipline follows the pattern set forth in Matthew 18 on how to confront a brother or sister engaged in clear, unrepentant sin. This is the kind of discipline that, though its goal is to lovingly restore, feels most negative because it is most confrontational. Thus, if that’s all you know you might be negatively disposed towards discipline. But corrective/restorative discipline (while necessary, good, and loving) isn’t the only kind of discipline present in a local church. In fact, the other kind of discipline — which we call “formative” discipline — is what you’ll most regularly engage in as a church member. And the more we practice formative discipline as a church, it’s likely we will find that we need restorative discipline less and less. Much like dieting or exercise, if you are consistent, your health issues and visits to the doctor are less frequent. Conversely, if we as a church neglect to maintain our health as a regular pattern of church life and relationships, then we’ll find ourselves riddled with all kinds of misery and maladies due to our sinfulness.
Practicing Formative Discipline
Formative discipline refers to the regular pattern of Christian teaching, correction, exhortation, and admonishment that happens in the lives of God’s people as we seek to pursue holiness and build one another up in the faith. It’s where we proactively seek to produce positive spiritual qualities in each other. In short, formative discipline is faithful discipleship. It’s how we help each other follow Jesus and hold fast to Christ rather than our sin. We are engaged in this kind of spiritual formation through the regular teaching ministry of the church that instructs our hearts and minds, and in the fellowship we experience with one another as we weave our lives together as a church family. That is to say that the local church is meant to play a critical role in your growth as a Christian.
You and I are meant to live lives that rub up against each other so that iron sharpens iron (Prov. 27:17). This takes intentionality. We can live open, interwoven lives but forget to sharpen each other, leading to frustration rather than faithful presence. Each of us must humbly open up our lives and step into one another’s lives with the aim of spurring each other on towards love and good deeds (Heb. 10:25). Engaging in that effort we are to encourage faithfulness, lovingly confront sin, gladly forgive, happily work through temptations, bear one another’s burdens, rejoice in triumph, and pray loyally. When you see a brother or sister in sin, bring it to their attention with the hope of helping them grow. If you observe a brother or sister’s fruitfulness, notice it and encourage them in it. When Scripture hurts, ask where and why. Teach by bringing God’s truth to bear on trials and sorrows. Openly praise God for his work in other church members’ lives. When these practices (and more!) are 38 taken on in love for each other you are used by the Lord to help shape and form other Christians into his image (Col. 3:16). That’s why we call it formative discipline — transformation is taking place.
A Holy Church
Our Lord Jesus Christ desires we live set-apart lives so that the church mirrors his holy character. To this end, church discipline is de signed to maintain the purity of the church’s witness. Formative discipline plays a critical role in the life of the local church because God uses it to prevent the sin that might lead to corrective discipline. The more a church is shaped by formative discipline the less likely it may need to practice corrective discipline. Let us be faithful to engage in this process together so that we might be continually conformed to the image of Christ (Rom. 8:29). To do so will be uncomfortable at first, but as with anything the Lord calls us to, will result in much joy and spiritual fruit. No Christian is meant to endeavor upon the work of sanctification alone. We need a body of blood-bought saints looking out for us — a community of spiritual fathers, mothers, brothers, and sisters who love us well enough to be committed to helping us walk in holiness. Let’s endeavor to live this out with each other.
